The Porch is a Rather Conspicuous Gambling Area

From the files of the Knoxville Police Department

To most of us, big-time gambling busts seem like relics of a past era, though you may have heard about one just earlier this month at a small bar on East Magnolia. It read like the fast-cutting cinematic variety, wherein Spec. Ops. kick in doors, put 22 guys on the ground, snap photos, collect stacked cash from freezers and safes, and otherwise divide et impera.

Somewhat less sensational, but perhaps more relevant to you and your neighbors, is that you may also be confronted for illegal gambling on your own front porch.

According to a Knoxville Police report, an officer saw a man throwing what appeared to be money and dice around the floor of his porch. The officer concluded that "the defendant was risking money for profit in a game of chance," and one supposes that the operation was not a hedge fund.

The defendant began to make loud noises, probably to get the attention of his companions who may not have noticed the officer's arrival. According to the report this sound was a most "unreasonable noise" that "unreasonably annoyed people in his immediate vicinity." Like the "game of chance," this noise served "no legal or legitimate purpose," and was handled accordingly.

So if you're looking to make the most of your home gambling get-together this weekend, you may:

A) Entertain guests with some state-sanctioned gambling (see: the Tennessee State Lottery)

or

B) Be reasonable.