April 1 Special Edition: Heads Up, Knoxville!

Look! Orange!

Look! Orange!

Tennessee: Still Better Than Mississippi, Thank God

If there’s one thing we Tennesseans can always rely on being proud of, it’s the simple fact that we’re statistically WAY better off than those poor bastards in Mississippi:

Tennessee Mississippi

Illiteracy: 13% 16%

Murder Rate: 6.4 7.1 (per 100,000 people)

Unemployment: 10.7% 11.4%

Poverty: 15.5% 20.8%

Sources: Illiteracy, U.S. Dept. of Education, 2003; murder rate, U.S. Census, 2007; unemployment, U.S. Dept. of Labor, Feb. 2010; poverty, USDA, 2008.

Daily Affirmation

10 Greatest Things About Knoxville

1. Four seasons

2. The Vols

3. The mountains

4. The people (friendly!)

5. The Olive Garden

6. Low cost of living

7. Applebee’s

8. Great interstate access

9. P.F. Chang’s

10. Watching The Biggest Loser

Source: Knoxville Visitors Bureau

Street ChIt-Chat:

Photo with no caption

Travis Gray, Knoxville’s Friendliest Art Director

How long have you been designing the Metro Pulse?

Too damn long.

Do you think you’ll be doing this for the rest of your life because you enjoy it so much?

Yeah, because I will kill myself before I let that happen.

What kind of affectionate nicknames do you have for your co-workers?

“Loser #1,” “Loser #2,” and onward forever.

What’s your favorite joke you use to cheer up people who are sad?

Are you going to turn in your copy, or just sit there looking dead?

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