knoxville + new moon = 306,000 hits

Dear City of Knoxville, TN,

Are you ready? Do you think you can handle the swarm of girls that will be lining up at your doors weeks in advance? Are your Motel 6’s all paid up on their electric bills so they can Keep the lights on for everyone rolling into town? Do you even have any idea what the hell I’m talking about? Oh. Let me start over. Apparently New Moon is premiering in your town. Are you prepared?

I know the article only mentions the movie showing early for a charity event, but already plans are set in motion. Blogs have commented on how odd the choice of Knoxville is (no offense) over Los Angeles but have praised the cast for going somewhere a little less flashy. Airline’s customer service lines have been busy all week with Twihards trying to change their November flights from LAX to, uh, KNOX (?), fighting with the customer service rep over the $200 change flight fee but deciding in the end that “it’s worth it” to see Robert Pattinson, up close and personal, in the deep south.

I, for one, understand completely why the execs at Summit decided to whisk the cast from sunny LA to the Redneck Riviera. Knoxville offers the cast the following advantages for their site seeing tour: Mullets, Wife Beaters, Bluegrass, RC Colas and Moon Pies, Lee Press-On Nails, Fanny Packs, and Chevy Pick-up Trucks with gun racks and rebel flag bumper stickers, versus the following disadvantages of what is sure to be seen in LA: Hipster man bangs, flannel or plaid pearl snap shirts, dj’s who mash up pop music and oldies, vegan food, minx, murses & Toyota Prius’. Are you prepared with Knoxville’s finest rednecks to greet ’dem fellers from dat der big ocean in da west?

—posted by unintendedchoice,, July 8, 2009

Updated: Added a live link to make it easier to discern the origin of the post.

© 2009 MetroPulse. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.

Comments » 2

skcampbell writes:

If it wasn't for Bluegrass, you'd nevere even know about "wifebeaters, etc." I hope that the visitors won't meet you first as the retarded, self-righteous snob ambassador of a town that has more than a few citizens trying to elevate its culture, instead of sitting on their pompous asses and repeating tired lies about it's image. Grow up and move somewhere else if you are suffering so much. I think you'd do very well in say... LA-LA land, where the fires are only outdone by the utter lack of appreciation or understanding of place. MP, please clean your house.

cturczyn writes:

Er, perhaps you don't quite grasp the concept of "Knoxville Googled" -- the
column is a look at what OTHER people are saying about Knoxville, typically
from out of state. We didn't write this particular note -- it was posted by
"unintendedchoice" at the Letters to Twilight blog (as indicated), which is a site
devoted to Twilight fandom.

-Coury, ed.

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