Thank you for printing the most entertaining letter to the editor ever. ["Crossword Puzzle Not Good," Sept. 27, 2012]
The writer, whose first person pronoun is appropriately lower case) made some excellent points written in the style of James Joyce. Because some words and phrases are obscure, explanations are called for.
"Commandeering of disapproval" means rounding up against their wills everyone with a negative attitude.
"Infatuate with professional endeavor-ing" is a full time obsession with eating ens.
A "whome" is a prostitute who works from her place of residence.
"Intention to progress potetion writers" is the intent to improve the quality of written material about potables (things that are drinkable).
"Cheap laungeree outlests" are inexpensive coin laundries where underwear comes out smaller than it was when it went in.
"Supplicating veritable income" is praying to acquired money that exists only in the ether of the Web.
"Stiffling" is failure to tip the bartender.
Applying these meanings to the letter as a whole still makes it utter nonsense, but very enjoyable reading. The most important point he made is how Metro Pulse has singlehandedly destroyed Knoxville. Now we know who to blame for the utter emptiness of downtown. The letter is as amazing as the 1969 Mets, complete with Casey Stengle's unique language. It was quite an accomplishment for someone with a second-grade education.